The Dark Side of Competition

We live in a pretty crazy world right? Things are moving so fast it’s hard to keep up. There is always something new and better that we are itching to get our expectant hands on. We are always trying to be one step ahead. No one likes to be the last to watch that TV show, or listen to that song or try that new drink.

It brings out a competitive streak in all of us.The Dark Side of Competition

Don’t get me wrong, competition can be healthyIn the right context.

When it motivates, challenges or spurs us on….however, these occasions are few and far between.

For example, your home football team is in the playoffs (don’t ask me what that actually means.) Or you are trying to beat your Dad at a game of Monopoly. Or maybe you are trying to beat your own personal sprint record.

However, competitiveness has a dark side.

When you spend all of your time looking over your shoulder to be better than someone…you end up reversing instead of accelerating.

You lose focus of your goals and dreams, your unique qualities that make you special, and your purpose in this world.

Unfortunately, more often than not our competitiveness brings out our ugly side:

  • “I can’t believe she’s thinks she could be a doctor.”
  • “I deserve the promotion, I worked harder than him.”
  • “Maggie isn’t the artistic one, I am.”

And what does all of this competitiveness achieve?


It creates heartbreak, it ruins friendships and distracts us from our own journeys.

You can probably think of someone in your own life who brings out your competitive side.

It might be one of your siblings- who was always just that little bit smarter than you. Or it might be your best friend who has ended up with a nicer house, husband or family than yours. Or maybe it’s that annoying work colleague, who everyone else loves.

For me personally, I never thought of myself as a competitive person. Growing up I was pretty rubbish at most sports and I mostly put that down to not caring about winning enough.

But recently, God really put this on my heart. He has revealed to me a real thorn in my side. I began to realize that maybe I do have a competitive side after all.

Like how a couple of my good friends have lost weight and it made me seriously uncomfortable because I’m the skinny one– gosh!

Or when I find out someone loves baking or is studying nutrition, I’m like no that’s what I do! Find some other hobby.

So if we all have this problem…then what do we do about it?

How to Beat Our Competitive Nature:

  1. Pray for the person. 

    Whoever it is that you are jealous of…give it to God. Ask him to bless them abundantly(even if you have to grit your teeth.)

Because this gives you back the power. It removes the hardness in your heart instead of allowing it to take root.

  1. Work on your own insecurities.

    This requires you digging deep into why you have these feelings. Who are you trying to impress by having the latest cell phone? Why do you need to be the smartest of your siblings, does it make you a better person?

Maybe you need to spend time praying for God to help you with these feelings.

  1. Talk to the person.

    Hold up…yes you did read that right. I said talk to the person who’s making you feel jealous, insecure and competitive. This might sound extremely uncomfortable and somewhat loopy.

But…when you share how you feel it’s very likely that the person you are jealous of will have their own set of feelings and insecurities. Maybe it might help you to see that their life isn’t perfect either.

I hope this post helps you conquer your need to be the best.

Are you a competitive person?

What’s something you get competitive about?

About the author:

Megan is on a mission to redefine what it means to be healthy. Rebelling against the prioritization of clean eating and six packs, her focus is on finding balance in emotional, spiritual and physical health. You can find out more on her blog and connect with Megan via Instagram, Twitter or Facebook!



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